Perhaps the overflow of models, actresses, and beach bunnies is contributing to Los Angeles’s perpetually landing on lists like “Worst Cities for Women Looking to Marry.” Our “norm” is a practically unattainable standard.I have never been “the norm.” I have been overweight all my adult life (see also heavy, curvy, voluptuous, fat, “BBW” — whatever term you want to use).
We don’t like to look closely at this fact, especially inside the walls of the church where we hope to find less superficial dating criteria than one’s pant size, but the surplus of single, godly, intelligent plus-size women speaks to reality.I am good at writing and making jokes and cleaning. I would love to pass my days maneuvering a minivan full of foster kids to soccer games and recitals and tutoring.None of these things would be diminished because of my size, yet none of them seem to matter because of my size.I see it in the faces of guys I’m meeting for the first time after being matched on e Harmony, even though we’ve exchanged weeks of witty banter and embarrassing confessions.I hear it in the concerned tones of mentors and parents who repeat phrases such as, “You’ve got such a pretty face,” and “I know you want to be married someday. ” [How the search for a soulmate went from church potlucks to Tinder] Every ounce of my being cringes, because they’re probably right. I am talented and opinionated and passionate and valuable.If you are a plus size or fat person, you know how difficult it is to date.