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“Men mess up and then we feel badly about it.” One of my best friends in graduate school used to say this.As we swapped stories, too often this was a conclusion we came down to. Another said he was too good for the girl he was dating. Women wishing it was a small drawback and not an indication of something bigger.You’re left wondering what went wrong and analyzing (and reanalyzing and reanalyzing) things with your friends. While we’ll never be able to fully understand guys (and we probably wouldn’t want to), you can learn from these moments.We found 10 women in your situation and asked experts to give their insights on what happened so you can dodge future dating disasters.Your partner may be dating others, or have no desire to focus on ‘one person.’ They may be fuzzy on what they want. They may give you an option for getting together on a certain night that’s not good for you. Again, you’re doing all the work to keep the relationship going. If your date is only seeing you for the purpose of sex, you’re just a “booty call.” They’ve got you trapped in a “box” and there’s little you can do to shift from that position. If there’s no romance on their part, they may see you as a “friend.” When attraction is romantic, there’s some form of touching, kissing or other physical expression. One, or both of you act like you are “single” in public: Your partner acts as though they’re “not with you” when in a public setting.No matter the reason, they don’t have sufficient impetus to make you a priority in their life. If you don’t agree, they won’t adjust their schedule or offer you an alternative plan. Someone who behaves in this manner is lazy and self-centered. This is the way we show a person they’re more than a friend to us. Or, you instinctively feel it’s “wrong” to show that you are together.

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To end the confusion, here are 8 signs you’re “Going Nowhere.” 1.He/she doesn’t make plans to secure your time: You don’t know when you’ll see them or speak to them next.You feel like you’re the one doing all the “work.” Not making plans means this person likes you and enjoys your company. It’s the action and behavior of a person who’s still sampling the buffet table of life, and/or not ready or able to be serious with anyone. You’re seeing a person from time to time and they make some plans, but nothing that would require effort on their part: They’re are making some effort to see you from time to time, but not enough to offer any tangible signs of your increasing importance in their life.It can even feel like too much work starting over with someone new.But deep down you may have a nagging feeling that something just isn’t right.Above all, keep the tone light and maintain open lines of communication.

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